Hmm I already average 72-73ms with my 3600mhz kit wonder if it all drop lower for me as well

which XMP do you guys recommend? XMP1 or XMP2?

Totally dependent on your ram and stability. My kit does not have 2 XMP profiles. Xmp2 will be faster but may be less stable, you'll have to test which is best for you 

I've got a bone stock standard R12 with i9 and 3080 with 32gb 3200 ram.  XMP2 is what I'm using. works fine