M6400 Power-On Failure- 8 seconds then power off

Having a strange problem with my laptop.  I hit the power button, the CD rom make the "gerd" sound of powering, no display or other indicators light, then the machine powers itself back off again. 

I am running the latest BIOS.  I have tried:

Removing Battery and booting with just AC adapter

Removing all power and holding in the power button for 10 secs

Powering up with AC adapter or battery and holding in the power button

Opening CD drive, then powering on

Pushing the power button while hopping on one leg and chanting the charm of making...

Thinking the next step would be removing the hard drive... seems likely that the hard drive is shorting they system bus or something.

Then I guess I will try removing the memory, but since I am not getting a base-64 or any other memory beep code on boot, it seems unlikely.

Anyone have any other suggestions?  I called Dell and a Hindu man told me I should try sacrificing a stick of (oddly enough) turkey jerky and a 2 liter bottle of Mountain Dew to the tech Gods in return for a functional laptop... but I don't want to waste perfectly good jerky unless I absolutely have to!