Try use sata ssd only, disconnect mechanical hdd and dvd from 7020 SFF which is your pc based on 255W psu.  this would help save power if your gpu is underpowered.

If video and reset issue persist, consider upgrade psu to 315 W psu: 4FCWX OEM Dell Optiplex XE2 Small Form PSU 315 Watt D315ES-00 D315E001L VX372

I do t have hdd only ssd and the card that works is a 1030 so I’m assuming it’s the power supply ain’t enough only thing I can think I never installed a new one either and don’t wanna mess up the system if I get the 315 one is it easy to change

If you get the 315 w psu, it is not difficult to change.  Overall service components in sff case feels a bit tight spaced so having small hands may help.  Thick fingers might feel more difficult.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T_ljkwj57lU
psu has same 8+4 pin as the 255w psu plus a 6 pin PCIe.

not sure your video issue is d/t psu but if you believe so can give it a try. 

53w card can be a stretch for a 250w PSU.  The more a PSU is stretched, the quicker it can wear out.

Best bet is 315w PSU from the XE2 as redxps suggested.