What you are trying to do is not really difficult, just different and they are probably not up on it.  Look at www.homenethelp.com for networking help.  It sounds like your computers got hacked or a virus.  I would start with fresh loads of Windows - boot to the cd and wipe all partitions and then make one partition, format, then load.  Then get the drivers from the Downloads tab above.  Then the Windows Updates.  Then get firewall software.  Then antivirus software.  With a router to the Directway, why are you using internet connection sharing?  The router is the computer to the Directway, the desktop should be wired to the router, and the notebook can go wirelessly to the router.  Both access directly through the router to the internet through the Directway.  ICS isn't needed.