So, all of the threads on this, many labelled "solved" are mostly NOT solved or solved in janky ways.

Basically, I spent $2000ish on a laptop, two years later the Wi-Fi is broken and I'm going to have to pay to have that looked at and fixed.
So much for Dell being the Mac killer. My Apple colleagues are LAUGHING at me right now!

Thanks for Dell!

I'm in my old MSI and Linux.

CLEARLY, there is a problem with this device. It is all over these forums and all over the internet. BUUUUUT, you've got nothing to say to your customers on this.

This was my first Dell in over a decade, and I thought that I was going to be sticking with Dell. I won't be.
Next we'll try a competitor with more reliability and better customer support.